It's Okay to Cry

It has been an emotional week. I had been doing okay with the flood up until a couple weeks ago, and then I cried for the first time since May. I cried again twice this week.

I used to be a crier. I think I get it from my mom. Things hit me pretty hard emotionally. After going into the hospital for mental health issues two years ago, my crying has not been as often. In fact, I started to view crying as a sign that something was wrong. I would call my doctor right away with hopes of straightening things out. That first year after the hospitalization, I think I only cried twice. I didn't like it. Something was missing. Something that used to be so "Laura" was now gone.

I asked my doctor about my lack of tears. Was the medicine preventing me from crying? He was not concerned, and I simply started being thankful for the fact that my life circumstances were going so well that I had nothing to cry about.

These past two years I've seen crying as I huge warning sign, but now I am trying to see it as a normal emotion, understanding that it is healthy if it does not get out of hand. I think crying and those emotions of frustration and sadness that go along with it are okay as you respond to it appropriately. What do you do with all of those emotions? Does it lead to anger? Or do you process through what is really bothering you at the time with hopes of changing something for the better.

Sometimes it takes me coming to tears to realize I need something. I need to talk. I need a hug. I need encouragement. I don't realize how worn out I've become until I reach the point of tears. In that moment, I cannot be afraid to ask for help. Simply expressing those emotions brings others to surround you with the love you need to carry on. How would they ever know you were hurting unless you express it? It's so hard to ask for help, so sometimes our tears will do that work for us.

I cried this week and clued others in that I was hurting. I was met with encouraging messages, helpful conversations on Facebook, texting, and the phone, two unplanned visits with friends, and love that allowed my day to end in laughter, not in tears.

After two years of tears being a sign that something must be wrong, I am slowly coming back to the place where I've realized to appreciate my tears and respond to them appropriately, realizing again that it's okay to cry.